Anyone who ventures into an unfamiliar massage in their own city or in a foreign place and would not be averse to a happy end, knows the situation: one hopes for a relaxation that is not limited to the normal muscles. But will the secret wish come true? Asking about it is not so well received in many supposedly serious businesses. So all that remains is to try to interpret certain signals, which then let the level of hope beat either in one direction or the other.
Thoughts like: Did that masseuse just touch my balls right now? Why are there pictures of naked people hanging on the wall? She's kneading my butt for a long time now? The masseuse has put on sexy make-up? Why is she now standing over my head so that I can almost feel her breasts on my forehead?
The whole guesswork has now come to an end. Because here are the top 10 indicators that there will be no happy ending:
10. the massage room door will remain open
9. the masseuse's mother is also in the room and there is non-stop talking
8. the light is so bright that you almost need sunglasses
7. other people in the room are being massaged at the same time
6. the masseuse complains during the whole session that all men are pigs
5. at the beginning you are forced to put on one of these disposable panties
4. you are in the spa of a 5-star hotel
3. the masseuse makes every effort not to massage near the hot zones
2. you have booked a foot massage
and the most obvious point is that you have to find the happy ending at home:
1. when massaging your legs, the masseuse rams the cloth into your crotch so much that definitely no contact can take place, not even accidental contact.
